Our employees are often put in a position to make a difference in the lives of our clients.  Leisha Hall, the Administrator of the All Valley Home Care office in East County, California shares the story of rejoining one of her clients with his son during the last moments of his life.

In our office we have a lot of hospice clients.  These cases can be challenging, particularly finding the right caregiver.  It is important that the caregiver be skilled enough to manage the practical aspects of patient care, while also having a personality that conveys warmth and compassion without being overly emotional.  In addition to caring for the patient himself, there are often complex family issues that come up when a loved one is dying.

I had a client who was 84, bed bound and dying of cancer.  He was a widower of many years, a war veteran and more than a little grouchy.  When I did the paperwork on this case I asked him if he had any family and he told me rather gruffly: “I used to have a son, but we haven’t spoken since my wife died.  She never gave up trying to get us together, but it’s too late now.”  I offered to get in touch with his son, but he refused and changed the subject so I didn’t push.

When I reviewed the case with my caregiver, I told her about this exchange, and suggested she bring up the possibility of making peace with his son if she felt the moment was right.  At first he didn’t talk much, but after a few days he started talking about his life, and kept talking.  He told her how much he had loved his wife and his only son, but that he never really was able to show it.  He told her how he became estranged from his son after he dodged the draft during the Vietnam War.  My caregiver did a lot of listening, but gently pointed out that perhaps it was time to let go of the past and try to make peace.  The client over and over again just shook his head sadly and told her it was “too late.”

A few weeks later, he began to quickly decline.  He was no longer able to speak.  My caregiver gathered items that she knew were important to him and placed them on his bedside table where he could see them; his military medals and dog tags as well as an old picture she had found of he and his wife holding a baby.  It was late in the afternoon when I got the call from her to “find the son!”

He was easier to find than I thought.  I guess some things are meant to be. I Googled his name and found he was employed in a studio in LA. After only 3 phone calls I located his secretary, told her I needed to speak with him urgently about his father, and within an hour I was talking to the son as he drove south toSan Diego. I was blessed to be present when they saw each other for the first time in so many years. I stood back with my caregiver and watched discreetly from a distance as the man in the suit reached out and took the hand of his father. Neither spoke, but no words were necessary.

It takes a special caregiver to know that giving care to a client involves not just the hands, but the heart. Her willingness to go above and beyond helped to bring enduring peace to a family that had appeared to be broken. As she told me when I left the home that night humbled by what I saw: “As long as there is breath, it is never too late.”

The following story is an experience of Dayna Sommer, a Client Care Manager from All Valley Home Care in Orange County, California, a VIDA Certified Senior Home Care Agency.  One of the most important aspects of the VIDA family is the attitude that “We Can Help You now”, whether or not you are a client or will ever become a client.  Our Care Managers and Caregivers are in this business to help the communities we serve.

One day last February, I received a telephone call from a local dementia/psychiatric hospital regarding the discharge of one of their patients.  They weren’t sure what he was going to need as far as follow up care, but he at least needed a ride home.  I arrived at the hospital as he was saying goodbye to the staff and social workers, and he gingerly climbed into my car.  He didn’t talk much on our way to his apartment.  Upon arrival, however, he could not find his keys and was sure someone had robbed his apartment.  I talked to the administrator to obtain another set of keys for him, and escorted him up to his apartment.  He had been in the hospital for quite some time, and I asked him if he needed anything, groceries, etc.  He said he hadn’t eaten in a while, so I took him to a small local restaurant.  He had a really hard time feeding himself his spaghetti and meat balls.  He wanted to go home then, and I told him I would be back tomorrow to check on him. 

When I arrived the next morning, “Sam” told me he was released too early, and wanted to go back to the hospital.  I called the social worker that I had met there, and she told me to bring him in.  On our way there, Sam handed me a package that he had carried with him from his apartment.  It looked like food wrappers and papers bundled together.  Looking closer, I realized it was a large amount of cash.  He told me that he thought he was going to die soon, and to use the money to cremate him and spread his ashes over the ocean.  Then to take the rest and do whatever I wanted with it.  I told him that I would do the best I could.  When we got to the hospital, I handed Sam over to the nurses, and handed the cash bundle over to the social worker.  The look on Sam’s face could have killed me, but it was the right thing to do.  The social worker called me the next day to tell me that the package contained $24,000, and that they would keep it in their safe until his release.

Over the course of several months, Sam went into a rehab facility, and was eventually released back home.  I have visited him many times and put my efforts into getting his money returned to him, which finally happened in August of this year.  Although Sam would never allow me to arrange a caregiver for him, we formed a friendship unlike any I’ve ever had.